Algernon Pritt – Convicted of Excessive Sighing During Town Meetings.
Sentence: Fined 2 aureals; required to hum cheerfully whenever sighs are imminent.
Mirabel Quince – Charged with Improper Hoarding of Radishes Beyond Family Consumption.
Sentence: Fined 3 aureals; surplus radishes donated to the Parish Choir.
Cornelius Dabb – Found guilty of Reckless Bellows-Pumping in the Smithy (singed three apprentices).
Sentence: Bellows duty suspended; fined 5 aureals.
Felicity Hogg – Cited for Persistent Gossiping with Geese at Dawn.
Sentence: Geese confiscated for one week; fined 1 aureal.
Barnaby Crumpet – Arrested for Unauthorized Sale of “Perpetual Motion” Egg Beaters.
Sentence: Fined 6 aureals; ordered to whip cream by hand for a public demonstration.
Honoria Latch – Convicted of Improper Use of Hymnals as Kindling.
Sentence: Required to hand-copy three hymnals; fined 4 aureals.
Peregrine Vole – Guilty of Loitering in Cloakrooms Without a Cloak.
Sentence: Fined 2 aureals; must wear a sign reading “No Cloak, No Loiter” for a fortnight.
Clementina Droddle – Charged with Overzealous Application of Lavender Scent in Public Assembly.
Sentence: Fined 1 aureal; limited to half a drop of lavender per day.
Ezekiel Snott – Found guilty of Improper Display of Vegetables Arranged as Royal Portraits.
Sentence: Vegetables confiscated; fined 3 aureals; portraits replaced with official likenesses.
Verity Klegg – Convicted of Interrupting Court Proceedings With Interpretive Sneezing.
Sentence: Fined 2 aureals; issued a box of tissues stamped with the royal seal.
Harold Pimm – Cited for Attempted Theft of Public Bench for “Private Contemplation.”
Sentence: Fined 5 aureals; required to contemplate publicly for six days straight.
Martha Tindle – Arrested for Unauthorized Use of a Cowbell as a Doorbell.
Sentence: Bell confiscated; fined 2 aureals; ordered to knock politely instead.
Oswin Japp – Convicted of Failure to Wear Proper Hat During Sunday Parade.
Sentence: Fined 1 aureal; issued a compulsory bowler hat labeled “Correctional Headgear.”
Lucinda Sprott – Found guilty of Public Over-Enthusiasm in the Consumption of Pudding.
Sentence: Fined 3 aureals; required to eat only dry biscuits in public for one week.